Worries, and Volunteering.

Last night I was up and down with the dogs all night. (Once again, I gave them some people food that didn't agree with their stomaches.) But the good part of that is that I was able to catch multiple dreams. The first I caught was at around 12:00.
I was with my friend Mitzie in a back yard (mine supposedly)of a New York town house. Bible study had just ended and we were talking about the painting I just finished for her. (A painting I really did just finish yesterday.) As we talked we got fruit off of a tree. The discussion was about things she wanted to add to the painting. She wanted to add some poppies on a hill in the background. I was a little flustered that I was no longer "done" with the painting. When we finally looked at the clock it said 3:00AM. We mentioned that she had stayed for four hours since study time. Then, as we were walking to the front door we noticed it was open. "That's not good." I was shocked and had a fleeting thought that a burglar had gotten in my house, but when I looked out the door I noticed my dad sitting on the brick stair railing that butted up against the porch. I could see people and ambulances and other 3:00AM type sights on the streets of New York around my house. My dad was looking forlorn watching and waiting. I asked what he was doing. He said, "Savannah's not home yet." (That's my 18 year old daughter.) I knew what that meant. When she did get home she would be in DEEP trouble, and her car would be taken away. The rest of the dream was just standing there looking, waiting, and thinking about where she could be. Was she in danger? Was she out with her boyfriend? hmmm.

There were two other dreams between then and morning, but all I remember from them are scattered images and a song, so I'll skip ahead to the one I had just before waking up at 6:00.

I was volunteering at a woman's shelter (probably thinking of a book I'm reading called House of Hope). I had walked through the building and then around the block. When I came around to the back door I noticed a large pile of feminine products. Someone had dropped off a donation of pads, razors, tampons, aspirin, q-tips, etc. I started gathering them into my arms, and taking them inside. A woman told me where there was a bathroom that I could stash them in. It took me a few trips but the moment I was done I was ushered into a multipurpose room with cork boards along the wall covered in construction paper with rick-rack edges ala-elementary school style. Some had things pinned to them, others were empty. There were plastic and metal chairs around the room and people started to filter inside. The pastor from my church told me to grab some things off the wall and put them away. I went to the wall and found injection viles and other types of medical looking paraphernalia. I was taking them down while Pastor Scott was having the women sit in chairs. I took the stuff outside where I assumed there would be someone to pick them up, or perhaps I was waiting for another donation. I'm not sure, but there was a litter of puppies outside that needed my care. So I started loving on them. Then I woke up.

The first dream is pretty obviously about two things I'm worried about. I want to be done with Mitzie's painting, as it has been on my to-do list for a year now. And I'm worried about my daughter getting into any furthur trouble because my husband has said the next thing to be taken away will be her car.
The second dream no doubt centers around my book. I've mentioned before that puppies in my dreams usually refer to youth. I tend to work with youth more so than with women my own age or older.

"Upstream"

Well, it has begun.
I have officially started my first "dream painting".
I actually started three yesterday and trashed the first two.
My husband encouraged me that I can't expect to get this right on the first try. I've never done it before... It may take time. I shouldn't assume that the first one I do will actually go into the show in August.
So I cut myself some slack and started another one thinking that it may end up in the trash too.
The painting I'm working on today is a dream from two days ago.

The dream went like this:
My friend Olivia and I were in an elevator trying to get to the 5th floor. There were digital clock type things sitting on pedestals around the elevator. Each one displayed the #5 in some way. I kept pushing the #5 on all the various screens and buttons, but we never went anywhere. At one point we pushed 7 accidentally (because the numbers on the clocks changed)and went to the 7th floor, but we stayed in and tried to push 5 again. The time was moving so slowly that Olivia started to deal with a lady behind a bank desk about her house mortgage (all inside the elevator). Finally we got out at the lobby which was a huge room like at a train station/mall with white marble floors with black tiles interspersed. Ahead of us down a long grand hall was a man dressed like a guard of some sort with another man in a trench coat standing/floating above his head. I announced to Olivia that the man on the guard's head was an angel. We saw the grand staircase to our left and decided to use it to get to the 5th floor.
As I walked up the stairway I was no longer with Olivia. My dad was with me. The stairway was now outside and it zigzagged like a typical outdoor stairway with gaps between the stairs. To the left of the stairs was a waterfall. At each landing the waterfall had a small pool about 4-5 feet long, just like the landing. There were coy fish swimming up the waterfall like salmon going upstream. At one of the landings I stopped to rub the scales of one of the coy, soothing it, trying to let it rest. Then I let it go again. At the next section of stairs I noticed that a red nose pit bull was swimming upstream. She was trying her hardest to make it out of the waterfall, but just like the coy, she was going up, not down. I knelt by the side of the small pool and pulled her out of the water. Then, pit bull by my side, we made our way up to the 5th floor. In the room, the dog rested. I was thinking about the pit bull's energy level and how she must be so used to swimming all day that she may be too high energy for someone like me. She was all muscle. There was no fat on her body, and you could see her ribs. At least for now, she was tired and would be resting for a long time. The scene changed and I was now bringing my new dog secretly down the back stairs (metal, like a fire escape, but not like a ladder) to go to the bathroom out back by the dumpsters. I found an old chain and a bike lock and made a leash out of it. I also found a small contraption that looked like a shower head from an old motel. At the bottom of the stairs on our way back up an old janitor stopped us and asked about the dog and the chain. He claimed that the chain was his and of course that I was not supposed to have that dog. He asked for the shower head contraption. It was supposed to tell the history of what it belonged to... in this case, the dog. I was scared that it would show that the dog belonged in the fountain, doomed to struggle all of her life. But instead, as he opened the top, by turning it half a turn to the right, it just let out a shot of air, no history. I was free to go and take the dog with me... though I did give back the old chain and bicycle lock to the janitor.

As I was painting just now, I was overwhelmed by the emotion that I had seeing this poor pit bull swimming upstream. God gently whispered that He too cared about the mistreatment of the pitties around the US. Pit bulls and their mistreatment is a subject near and dear to my heart, because my baby, my precious 4 year old dog, is a pit bull. He is brindled and beautiful. It breaks my heart that pit bulls around the country are being killed because of breed legislation. Others are being fought, others are just misunderstood and feared. The dream was obviously about the struggle that pit bulls face, but what about the rest of the dream?
Well... the coy also swimming upstream speak to me of my other friend Barbara. She has coy fish that will let you pet them (well, they let her pet them). She is dealing with an "upstream" battle now, and though I'm no real help, I can provide a small rest.
The part with Olivia in the elevator is dealing with her wanting to get to a place of redemption. 5 is the number of grace, redemption, provision, and the like. We tried and tried to get there in the elevator. She even took time to go to the bank while waiting. But in the end we had to climb stairs. The easy way was put on pedestals... but it didn't work for us. As we charted our course in the grand hall we saw a guard with an angel. I had to point this out, it wasn't obvious to Olivia... but it was comforting, and it was inspiring. It sent us on our way. Now why she wasn't with me on the stairs I think is just a break in the story of the dream. I didn't need to dream about Olivia anymore because MY part with her was done... Now I was on my own stair climbing journey. My dad being with me, was just a picture of God with me, helping me to help my friend, and the pit bulls.
The old chain and the back stairs to the dumpster were symbolic of me just using trash to care for the pitties. I don't "DO" anything. I just post about them on facebook, and say nice things about them to people. There is no real sacrifice on my part. The fact that no history showed up from the "shower head contraption" speaks of a clean slate. God's perfect plan for these dogs is to not have a stereotype attached, no prejudices. I'm left with the question, now what? What do I do with that?
Well... at 12:00 I'm heading over to play a game with Barbara and her daughters.
My husband just yesterday asked which charities I would like to give to. I have never given anything substantial to a non-Christian charity, but I think this year I will be helping the pitties in a bigger way.
As for Olivia, I'm not sure I need to do anything. I'll have to talk to her and see how it's going. ;-)

Facing a Storm, Dad's Sand Mound, and Complicated Water Works.

Three dreams in fairly rapid succession last night... and you know what that means. (Three dreams in a row... IF they go together, are dreams with an unchangeable message.)

My first dream was on a boat. I was with my family. The boat had an inside and an outside. I was down inside the boat and asked my son if he wanted to go up to the deck. I knew when I asked (and so did he) that we would not be able to go back inside if we chose to stay outside. On the deck my parents were dealing with boat type stuff and very quickly a storm rose up. The storm was massive. We all had on rain ponchos and were basically holding on for dear life. One wave came up and over the side of the boat, washing the floor of the deck. Then another much larger wave started to form on the opposite side of the boat (the side to my left, which was actually starboard, because I was facing back). The wave looked like it was three stories high and paused for a moment before it crashed over us. I was so frightened of it, but my mom wasn't. Then as it hit it fell with the force of tap water. We were fine. I looked at my mom and she gave me a very knowing look. That was the end of dream #1.

Dream #2 was on the shore. My parents and my kids and I were laying on a beach. It was like we had been washed ashore, but it was pleasant. All I could see of the scene was our legs and sometimes arms and the sand they were on with the bubbles from the tide that was rolling in and out. It was very peaceful. We talked awhile and then sat up. My view was not of the ocean. The camera of my dream was as if I was in the water and focused in on my dad's legs and arms as he built up a mound of sand to "protect" his spot from water coming in. The mound he had made was only about 16" wide and high, and the water just went around it, making it completely obsolete.

Now the tricky part is that I don't remember if the conversation that I remember goes to dream #2 or dream #3. It seems to fit better in #3, but I almost want to put it in with #2. So I'll stick it in the middle:
The conversation was about my dad having a job overseas. I think the area they were talking about was in Northern Europe. But the words that were being said sounded like they didn't want him there, so they probably wouldn't move after all.

In dream #3 we were visiting the Gores. It was my family and my parents and we were walking down a street in Northern Europe. The Gores lived there and I guess it was where my dad's possible job was... but as we know from the conversation mentioned above... he wasn't going to take the position. Jennifer Gore (My mom's BF) was still alive and walking with us. Monnie Gore and my dad were talking and the kids (all the correct age for 2011) were walking along too. The shops had things like wooden dolls and coo-coo-clocks. The streets were cobblestone and there was a quaint little bridge that reminded me of my favorite visit to Germany. We went to the Gores' house which was not like any I have dreamt of before, other than it being on a hill. It was on a crowded street where the houses share an outside wall. Inside people were talking about getting hungry and where we would go to eat. I guess my son must have had some say, because Taco Bell was the decision. Everyone got up to go walk to the Taco Bell, which I guess was down the street a couple blocks. I had to go to the bathroom and wash my hands. I went in the bathroom but left the door open (or maybe there was no door). It was small and in the front of the master bedroom. Standing at the sink which was wedged in a corner, I could see into the living room and down to the kitchen. (There was brownish/bronze old shag carpet in the living room.) The sink was ill fitted into the space on the small Formica counter top. I couldn't get the water to come on. The nob that seemed to be the way to turn it on just leaked a little at the base when I messed with it. I tried one more thing, then looked out to the living room for help. Everyone else had left except my mom and Jennifer who were waiting on me. Jennifer came over to help. She grabbed two different chords; one looked like an old kitchen sink pull-out nozzle, (You know the ones from the 70's with the black head and little squeeze trigger, and a silver ring right next to the head, and near the hose, which was also silvery.) and the other chord was more like a tasseled rope that you'd pull for service at an old timely hotel. The tasseled one came from under the sink and the first was just where you'd expect it to be... but the water came out of a whole other faucet that looked normal for a bathroom.
That was the end the 3rd dream.

So the question is... is there a theme? Do they fit together? or not? and either way, what are they saying?

The first dream reminded me a lot of one I had not long ago where the line of church people were going to "camp" with all their stuff, and I asked my son if he wanted to go home instead, and he said "Yes", knowing, that that was a final decision. In this dream the "final decision" was to be protected under the deck, or out in the storm. We chose the storm. And fortunately it turned out that the storm didn't hurt us. I really liked that dream. I love getting a message that whatever is coming, isn't going to hurt me. It's the same message I got a while back in my dream about the Bay area cracking off into the ocean, but that we would be fine.

The second dream was interesting to me because of its perspective. I never saw faces, not even chests. I was looking at my dad from a place on the beach that I was not sitting. It was a third person... very zoomed lens kind of dream. (Most of the time when I have third person dreams I can see the whole scene, so this was odd. It was also odd to have my dad build something so pitiful and think it may work.

The third dream, which was the "fullest" of the three (though not as meaningful as the first to me), was one of just a few over my life where I have dreamt of a deceased person being alive in the present. Jennifer died a few years ago.
I'm not sure if my dad's job predicament had any meaning in the dream. My parents have always talked about going back over seas if Dad could get a pastoral position in a church in Italy. I'm not sure how often he looks into that possibility, but I know he has a few times.
The Gores lived near us when we lived in Italy, so them being in that part of the world makes sense (even though they live in Colorado now).
The state of the house... having shared walls, having an old shag carpet, and the sink with the retro nozzle and Formica counter top, were all things that didn't speak well of the situation of the house. My mom has mentioned on occasion how much Jennifer held that family together, and now that she is gone it's just not the same. I see that played out with her being the one to help me, and even how she had to pull on two things to make the water work correctly.

Anyway, I'll have to think further about any theme. Right now, I kind of see them as separate. Though the first and second could be related, and the second and third (with regards to my father's job and sand mound) could be related.

Swimming with Little Audrey

Last night's dream came out of left field.
In a couple of weeks we are going to Hawaii. My parents are going to meet my family there, and they are bringing with them their "god-daughter", Audrey Gore. My mom and Audrey's mom were best friends. Audrey's mom died a few years ago and her dad remarried without complete approval of the kids. Things have been awkward ever since.
Anyway, Audrey is now graduating from college, and for her present my parents offered to bring her to Hawaii with us. So I will be seeing her soon. (Last time I saw her was at Thanksgiving, which was the first time in years.) However, I have not been actively thinking of Audrey at all, and that is why the dream caught me off guard.
I have never dreamt specifically about Audrey. I have dreamt about her "family", especially back when her mother was alive. I've dreamt of their house often in the past too, but never Audrey specifically. I know this dream was to prepare me for Hawaii in some way, now I just have to figure it out. I thought the back-story would best be told before we got into the dream, so there you have it.

In the dream I was in a very large and deep pool holding baby (1 1/2- 2 yrs old) Audrey near the edge. She had her arms around my neck and I was holding the edge with one hand and cradling her with the other. My parents were swimming with us. The pool was fairly crowded, but not overly so. It was Olympic sized, and didn't have a shallow end. Concrete was all around. Because of the depth and the crowd I talked to my parents about taking Audrey someplace else. I got out and we walked outside to a place I had been before. It was a hot tub that's been in my dreams before... not too long ago. I got in with Audrey. There were college age(the age that Audrey is in real life) boys in the hot tub. While we were in the hot tub (which had two levels; we were in the lower one), I noticed the scenery. It was very different from what had been around the hot tub in my previous dream. It was like a swamp/lake. I've dreamt of that place before too. (In the previous dream I think there were alligators and I was swimming for my life.) Anyway, as I looked back the hot tub even had moss and algae growing on the edges. It all looked very old and run down. At this point I thought that the area was an old camp ground I had visited in my youth and that things had just gotten over grown. I picked up Audrey and we made our way up and out of the hot tub. (As we did, I worried about the boys noticing that I hadn't shaved. haha.) One mentioned to another that I was old when I was going up the steps. I turned and said, "I'm only 35!"
I looked down at the swamp/lake below (the hot tub was up on a cliff... but only like 20 feet high). There was an old mock pirate ship that I remembered from my "camp days". It was all covered with algae and moss and yuck, but there were still boys playing on it, so we went down to it. (I don't know how... that part kind of skipped.) We walked around on the ship briefly then decided to go back up. The side of the cliff had tree roots gnarling in and out of it and some trunks that started at the base were half buried in the side too. Audrey held on around my neck as I pulled myself up the side of the cliff on a rope/vine that was used for this purpose. Half way up, I noted that I had not taken the easy way, and that only 10 feet to my right there was a much better way. We would go down and try that way instead. Then I woke up.

When Audrey was little we all lived in Italy. Every now and again we would go to indoor water parks (usually in Austria). I can remember at least once going to one with Audrey and her family. It was the one time I attempted a flip off a high dive. I knocked the wind out of myself and couldn't breath even when I reached the surface of the water. It was so scary. The indoor section of the dream reminded me of that pool though... no shallow end, big, somewhat crowded with strangers, and scary.
Swimming in dreams is typically a refreshing or cleansing thing. However, noting the swampiness of our setting outside, I'm not sure this "cleansing" went as planned.
The fact that Audrey was represented as a baby just breaks my heart. She is the youngest of her siblings, and has no doubt had the hardest time of any of them with her mother's death and father's remarriage. She is worried about what the rest of her life is going to look like with college over and not feeling welcome to stay at her old house. It's a very deep pool indeed to be in.
The outdoor part of the dream seems like a lot of "trying" on my part, without any real success. A hot tub full of boys her age could be an attempt to lose her sorrow by being preoccupied with boys, but being a baby shows maybe she's not quite ready for that. (Maybe)
Then I take her down to a childhood play structure (the pirate ship) but it's all gross too. There's corrosion on both the hot tub and the pirate ship. So keeping her in a "child" state is not the answer either.
Then there's the mystery of going up out of that situation the hard way... realizing there is an easier way, but waking up before I took the easy way... all the while, Audrey still as a baby around my neck.

Well... I pray that our time in Hawaii would be healing, growing, and refreshing. I hope is some way, I'm able to help, and not make things worse. Dreams are typically warnings when they show bad things, so I consider myself warned to not make "cleansing plans" for Audrey. I'll just follow God's lead, not my own ideas.

Missing Quiz

a night full of dreams last night... all fairly random.
I don't remember any of the first ones hardly at all... other than one dealt with children... but I do remember the last one...

I was taking a quiz with a bunch of other people all sitting in small elementary school desks. The quiz was about Islam. (We have been doing this on Wednesday night church during a series about the differences and similarities of Islam and Christianity.) In the dream the quiz was much more elaborate, like a term paper, and I could not find my paper for that day. I kept flipping through my other papers from previous days, but could not find the one for that session. My pastor's oldest son was sitting beside me. I got up to look in another room. We were in a house with shag carpet. There was wood paneling on the walls and just a very 70's vibe all around. When I came back in the testing room my dad was on the big screen larger than life as a sort of background to the other imagery that was going across the screen. ...and I was naked. I told Tyler, "that's my dad," as I pointed to his image on the screen. I pointed like 3 or 4 times because he didn't seem to see.
That was the extent of that dream.

Again with the nakedness.... again with the lack of preparedness... geez... what am I not getting?

More Exposure and Lack of Control

The night before last I had a dream about taking both dogs to "Camp Bow-wow" while I'm gone on vacation next month. That was simply pushing me to get a place lined up for them to stay.

Last night's wasn't so simple:
I had two dreams (that I remember), one in which I was with a group of girls at a mansion having a retreat of sorts (the girls were young, like teens and twenties,) and I had keys in my hand walking topless down the hall where there were a handful of bell boys and male desk clerks.
I was minding my own business, but was being suspected of something. I don't remember if it had to do with the keys, or being topless, or what, but the men (also in their twenties) were whispering about me, and one was following me to confront me. Towards the end of the dream he did confront me, but I shrugged it off and said I wasn't doing anything, just taking the keys to the room.

In the second dream I was with a group of older men (not elderly, just 40+) and we all had long aluminum tubes that we were making car frames out of. Each of us had our own and it was loopy. We had to straighten it, bend it, cut it... whatever to make it work. The aluminum caught fire easily just by banging the tip on a surface, and we were warned about that. I had very little control over the big long tube and mine caught on fire within a minute of me holding it. I asked for help to put it out, even from my dad, but they all just told me to blow on it. I tried to blow it out but it wouldn't; It even flared up at a few of my attempts.

The alarm rang, and I had to get up. :(

There is a very big theme this week of exposure, and incompetence.
I need to remember that dreams are generally warnings or your own doubts playing out, not necessarily a prediction of what is actually going to happen if you heed the warning.
With the girls on retreat I can wrap my head around being in a situation like that, but building cars with aluminum tubes with a bunch a men... I cannot.
Only because they were older than me, and that my dad was there, I have a feeling that they represent older men in church, building (metaphorically) church things that are mobile. I was trying to be one of them, but had no control.

I talked with my friend Carrie the other day, and the conversation led to "where I fit in at church". My son has stopped going to the kid's class. He is eleven, and it's just too "little kidish" for him now. I still help out in there, but it's become odd now that he's not in there. I had been doing stuff with the teenage girls, but that basically stopped at the end of last summer, and now the girls I know are about to graduate, so I don't really want to volunteer in there either. I haven't been a part of women's ministries in years, other than my own bible study I host at my home, which has nothing to do with my church.
So there it is, in black and white. I have assignments that I feel will be shared with the church once complete, and for now I will focus on those, but my dreams continue to hash out where I fit in ministry.

"A Swell Space" and "He's Driving Again"

Two dreams last night.
One was with my Swell Sisters (my art society). We were in a very cool house with very large and open rooms; completely furnished in a nice way, with nothing lacking.
We were working on an art project that involved beads and old jewelry. One sister (Alyson) was looking for all the pearls, because her piece was going to be made of pearls. (I had just been thinking of pearls at my mom's house this weekend because of her strand hanging near the mirror.) (Pearls, as you know are symbolic of long suffering, and are also not to be shared with "pigs". :-))
We all handed Alyson our pearls... some small some normal "pearl size". We worked on our projects and I looked around the room taking in all the features.
Then Michael Gorman showed up to tell us our time was over and we had to clean up. (Michael is another local artist who hosts life drawing sessions that some of us have been to.) In the dream he was leasing the space to us. It was his place. It wasn't bad that we were having to clean up or anything, and he was a very gracious land lord. We mentioned being back soon, and that was the end of the dream.

The next dream began with my son driving again. (Perhaps I'm thinking of this because of how he doesn't like my daughter's driving now that she is old enough.)(Or it's just another dream about him running the show.) He was driving with my dad and I in the car and we were heading for his class. The class was hard to find and we had to go up a side of a mountain and then back down again through an Italian looking village. He was taking the corners too fast and I was trying to get him to slow down. Some how my dad was the one in charge of our directions and the fact that we were running late. We finally parked on the side of a steep road aiming down on a curve. We got out and climbed down the hill about 100 feet to a small building that was tucked in the side of the mountain. I opened the door to let my son in. The class was full of kids and I noticed on the clock that we were 23 minutes late. I apologized to his teacher (played by his real teacher), and my dad and I went to wait outside at a cafe table in front of the room. There were two old Italian men sitting at the table next to us and they had small wooden dolls with them.
The dolls were more like Lego or Play Mobile people than what you may think of as a wooden doll. They had a flesh toned block of wood for the body that was carved to resemble a flattened over weight bowling pin about the size of your palm. There were hair pieces and other things that you could attach to the bodies. One could have blonde braids, and another a brunette bubble-flip. Then there were little hats that fit in a divot on the back of the hair. I dressed one to look like a candy striper nurse lady, and another more like a pilgrim. Then one of the old men held a man doll that he put some crazy wooden hair on and lit on fire. The doll did not burn up, instead the flames became part of his paint job and kept flickering. Even the doll's face (which on all the others was blank) started moving and turning evil.
I grabbed my dad and said, "let's get out of here". Then I woke up.

Laundry and Teeth

Last night's dream stared me and my mom.
I was doing laundry... putting clothes in a very deep washing machine. Then I went to my mom's room and was looking for clothes to pack to go to summer camp. She opened a lower drawer for me and I started digging through it. I pulled out one shirt that I thought was something I wanted, then as I unfolded it, it became my son's Perry the Platypus T-shirt. Again I reached in the drawer and pulled out an article of clothing that ended up being my son's underwear. I pulled out one more thing of my son's and complained to my mom that these things aren't mine, they are his.

That was the extent of the dream.
As for interpretation... With me clothing dreams have to do with my weight and what track I'm on concerning my body. This specific dream equates me with my son. I started a diet this week... the same diet that I did this summer while my son was at a weight loss summer camp. I am mentally preparing myself for the journey ahead. It was so much easier when no kids were home this summer, but I won't have that this summer, so I'm going ahead and doing it now. The deep washing machine tells me that there is a lot of "cleansing" to do, and the lower drawer tells me that I'm at the bottom of this thing.

Saturday night I had another interesting dream. The night itself was interesting because I was dog sitting three dogs that were not mine. Two of them are chiweenie puppies, the same age as my Lhasa apso puppy. Very "needy" pups. Because I am such a push over I slept with all three of the other dogs and my own puppy. First on the couch, then up in the guest room. Every time I would move they would all wake up and re-arrange themselves. It was a long night to say the least!
Anyway I think the dream spoke of my situation as well as me being a push-over in general, and my indecision... or more pointedly, my inability to stick to decisions... to stand up to others, or even dogs for that matter.

The dream started with my sister and I walking to a camp site. (My sister, though I have no right to blame her any further, is the root of where I got my "door mat" status. She's a year older than me and was my boss and my mouth piece all through childhood.) We got to the area that we thought should be camp and there was a parking garage. We went up some cement stairs that were enclosed just like in a normal parking garage. As we looked we started to hear voices. It was my dad along with the rest of the youth group for camp. (My dad was a youth pastor for much of my childhood.) We scurried back down the stairs to meet them. There was a discussion that I didn't hear and my sister came to me and said, "they don't have room for everyone in the nice cabins. You and I should take one of the bad ones."
Well, I didn't want to take a bad one, but I didn't say anything. Then June (a lady from my church who is famous for her hugs) came up to me and hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You don't deserve a bad room, you should have a nice one."
I looked at my dad who was talking to the group and noticed that his teeth were brown and that they were fanned out on the top row like the old cartoon drawings of hillbillies. I saw that he had a cup of coffee in his hand. "You should rinse your mouth ofter you drink coffee Dad," I said. (Our dentist just told my daughter the same thing about soda last week... that's where that's from.) Then out of nowhere my grandmother (Dad's mom) appears and walks up to my dad and pulls out one of his teeth. The tooth she pulled came from the canine area, but it looked like a molar. My dad protested and then he pulled out his entire top row of teeth all at once on a metal grid. The teeth were large and each wrapped with metal that strung them all together. He was pointing out the spot that the one she had pulled came from, and arguing with her. Then I woke up.

As I said, I think that night, feeling very "trampled on", both figuratively, and literally, this dream speaks to being pushed around and being indecisive. My dad is the same way. Also, loosing teeth in dreams usually has to do with not being about to deal with things. (lost Incisors = indecision, lost molars = inability to "chew on things") That's John Paul Jackson's theory, not mine... But it seems to hold true in my dreams. Perhaps the image of my dad with terrible teeth is a symbolic warning of sorts to what lies ahead of me if I don't get this thing under control.

Three Sizes of Horses, and a Noah's Ark Cartoon

Well, I'm happy to say that last night's dream was much more pleasant than the night before.

The dream took place at our old house at VAFB (where I lived when I was 16-17), but the front yard was where the driveway was, like our house had been rotated to the right 90 degrees.
I was out "front" with my mom at a mirror that was in front of the bathroom window. We were doing our makeup outside. Nanny (Mom's mom) was there as well, inside cooking or something. I was putting on eyeliner when she came out to talk to us. Mom and her went back inside and I turned and faced the upright piano we owned (now at my sister's house), also in the front yard.
A huge tank (or ship) of some sort came gliding into our yard and stopped right at the piano, making a small dent in the left edge of the piano. I jolted around, very upset, to see what had hit the piano. When I recognized the man standing with the ship, I eased up and began to talk to him. He was an elderly man that I knew (in my dream) and I soon found out he was bringing things over for a Bible study for kids. Almost as soon as I realized what was going on I saw many more people, and the rest of what the man was bringing. The first thing was a giant horse. At first I thought it was an elephant, but looking up at the face I saw it was a horse. Someone was riding it too. Then I saw a normal sized horse and it had a rider as well. Then there was a very small miniature pony that I told a little girl (maybe 4 yrs. old) that she could ride it. My dad came out and he and the elderly man were putting a video of a cartoon Noah's Ark story on a screen. I was watching the video with all the kids scattered around the yard and with all these crazy props around the yard too.

That was it.

A logical thought is that because I'm helping out in Children's church today, I was simply dreaming about that. That really only covers the video part of the dream though.
I don't quite feel like thinking much about it at the present, so I'm going to go have my Fourth of July!
Happy Independence Day Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let the Inappropriateness Continue

Another weird one last night.

It began in a house most closely related to a house lived in in Florida when I was 7, but with elements of a house from NC when I was 5. I was there with my daughter and my son and we were getting ready to leave for somewhere. My daughter was ready and in the kitchen and my son was still putting on shoes and socks in his room. I was yelling at him to not lolly-gag. I was even getting violent. Not hitting him, just raving like a lunatic. He was a teenager in the dream (which is the first time I've ever dreamed of him older than he is). My daughter was still a teenager too though.
Out of the blue an old class mate named Terri Scott showed up at the back sliding glass door. I motioned for her to come around to the front. Then I noticed it was raining as she made her way around to a side door (also glass... and there were many windows along the side, so it was like I saw her the whole way as she walked). There were two dogs outside and both were wet and muddy from a puddle near the back door. I didn't want then to come in but I told Terri to come on in the side door. The dogs ran by her as she opened the door.
I walked through the back of the house again and my dad was sitting on the floor naked (a sight I've never actually seen). My daughter walked by and I got very upset with my dad for being exposed in front of her.
The scene changed a bit and we were in a house that I lived in when I was a pre-teen. It was just me and my dad and my mom in their room. My dad was still naked and the vibe was all wrong. Luckily I woke up then.

Thoughts on meaning...
well, my daughter and I had a conversation about penises the other day and how she had never seen one that didn't belong to a small child, or a statue. Also a day ago my nephew was wandering around the house naked and my dad made a comment about it. He quoted my daughter from when she was 2 and had walked in the bathroom where my dad was peeing. She said, "Why he's peeing through his dinger?" (meaning "finger").
That, I suppose, is why a naked father was in my mind.
As for Terri and the dogs, and the rain, and the glass... well, I don't know. I have been waiting for years for Terri to tell me something about her brother. He was a good friend of mine. She was a few years older than me and he was in my grade. She's on facebook, and he's not... so I've been asking about him, but still no word. Perhaps she will tell me soon. I'll go look on her page for news. I'm hoping it's not bad... as the rain and yucky dogs would suggest.
And why was I yelling at my son? Yes, he often does lolly-gag and it's irritating, but not "rage" worthy. Perhaps it's just my anger at kids at camp surrounding my son. I got a letter from him yesterday talking about some bullies at camp. It made me mad. Socks (with his name on them in sharpie) make me think of camp... which is what he was putting on in the dream.

Island Vacation, Bath Cave, and Highrise Homework

In mt first dream I was swimming in an enormous man-made lake. We were on vacation of some sort and had just arrived to our island home. The scene around the side of the lake that we were on was very 'other worldly'. It looked like a movie set. The houses were built way too close to the water, jutting out of the (not very high) cliffs. There was brown showing around the homes, and vines hanging sporadically. There were wooden deck walkways from some houses and others you had to use the vines to get to.

We had been dropped off somewhere in the lake and were swimming to shore with a group of people. The only person outside of my family that I recognized was our friend Greta. (That makes sense because we have been on vacation with her twice, and really don't see her otherwise.) A large man led us up the bank and then we made our way around the cliffs to our 'home'.  That's all the dream had in it.

The second one was also about water, and lots of it. It was a roman bath house type place, but huge, and more like a cave. I was with a few of my Swell Sister ladies and we were 'bathing'. There were a few tiers to the place, and above one was a large water fall that glowed with a golden hue. The whole dream was just swimming around and climbing and being in the water fall etc. No talking. I had to wake up from the dream to pee in the middle of the night.

The third one was in a city setting. I was with my dad and we were visiting my friend Dori. It was a school day and I had to get to school soon. We were up really high in a sky-rise in her apartment in down town LA. (Even though she doesn't live there, or in an apartment, but the school we went to together was.) She was showing us her new doggies. (She does have a new doggy since I saw her last, but these dogs were not the right breed.) The dogs in the dream were "purse dogs", one black and brown and white with furry pointy ears like a papillon, and  the other was like a white miniature poodle.  I was holding one and we were looking out the window talking about taking it down to pee. But I realized I was late for school and I started urging my dad to hurry and take me. I grabbed my back pack, but I didn't have my books. I scrambled to find the books, got them into the bag and then realized I hadn't done my homework. I had English and some sort of Science. Then I reasoned with myself that I wasn't going for a grade, I was a grown up, and it really didn't matter that I hadn't done my homework. Reasoning with myself led me to remember I'm not really in school, and then I woke up.

Once again, I am at a loss for any meaning... but they were interesting dreams none-the-less.

Awkward

My first dream:
I was with my mom and dad. We were at a mall because I wanted to go shopping. We had been walking for a very long time through halls with shops along the sides behind windows and doors. (It reminded me of Las Vegas when you have to go through a long hallway of shops from the parking garage to the main casino area.) The building we were in was old though; it was brick, and looked like a museum. After walking and still not shopping for a very long time, I actually said, "This mall is more like a museum." It was about at that point that we 'got some where'. My mom, in answer to my question, said, "Well let's go down this way." We started down some stairs that led to a Marie Calendars, but the stairs soon became a ladder. There were rungs every few feet, but the main handle on the sides was only every 6 feet. For some reason I wasn't using any of the middle rungs, only one every 6 feet that lined up with the handle. I was dropping, only holding the sides for the entire length of my body each time. My parents were coming down the ladder rung by rung, but face first... like they were crawling "spidey-style" down towards me.  I complained about the ladder. Almost directly after the complaint (and my mind thinking about what I was doing, and how I could do it differently) we were at the bottom. Instead of going through the restaurant, or sitting down, we went just to the right of the ladder where there was a bed. My mom lay on the bed on the right side, and I lay on my belly with my head and arms dangling off the end on the left side. Again, I stopped and realized what I was doing, and repositioned myself. The bed was very lumpy and I said it was better before. My mom thought that maybe I just needed less noise to be able to sleep, so I went to turn off the TV (no longer in the restaurant atmosphere). When I got to the TV I noticed that it had been recording every show for the past like 6 or so hours. I took some time to try to delete each show. (Probably more from my ipod frustration the other day... cause now I have so many unwanted songs to delete.)  The dream ended in frustration.


My next dream was far weirder.

I was riding the back seat of an open-air jeep type vehicle with four guys in the front and two more in the back with me. They almost all had guns (very skinny and short ones of varying colors, which they talked about,) and we were driving through a neighborhood to do a drive-by shooting. They weren't aiming for people, but they wanted to scare the residents. They were all very "hard" looking, and talked in a way that said "gang" to me. We went around this neighborhood like three times, each time I faced inward and didn't look at what they were shooting at off the left side. (I was in the far left of the back seat.) When they were satisfied with their shooting we headed for the leaders house. As we approached the house a small squirrelish animal (without a tail) got on my leg and tried to hump it. I grabbed him to remove him but he just grabbed on to my arm and did the same. I told the guy in the back seat about it and he said, "Just let him do his thing." At this the squirrel bit me and latched on again to my leg. I shook him off as we exited the car at the leader’s house. Once we were in I looked down at the clothes I was wearing. I was dressed like a streetwalker, and shortly after, treated like one. At this point in the dream, unlike in the car, I was playing the role. I smacked my gum, I spoke 'gangsta' and used my body (which was rather slim in the dream) to entertain. At one point there was poop on the floor and I had to clean it up before anyone saw. I knew my place in the gang; I was basically dirt.

A large screen came down from the ceiling and they began to play music videos. The walls of the house went away and the area became huge with three different levels for watching a concert. It wasn't like a stadium, but there were a few seats scattered around and outdoor heaters here and there. A band came to the screen/stage and started to set up. I started to make my way as far away from the gang as I could, I ran into my husband on the top level near a heater and stood with him. The youth pastor from our church, Josh, was there and was announcing this as a "Tribes" event. (That's the name of the youth's Wednesday night service.) I looked around and saw Tribes posters. The gang members and a whole bunch of other people scattered around the place.

Then I woke up.

Who am I?

Tis the week of disturbing dreams, I have decided.

Last night's started with my daughter and I going to her first 'female exam'. It was in a college class room on a table. The room was very large and upstairs. The table was near a window. There were a total of three doctors, each came in one at a time. They were going to fill her "cavity" with some sort of mold making plaster substance. (I think this strange concept came from my husband's inner ear sound system molds that arrived yesterday.)  When the last Dr. came in he wanted to shave her and give her a "wig" made of the hair on her head... which was red in the dream. I told him not to shave her completely, explaining to him and her that it would itch like crazy when the hair grew back in.  He left the room and we escaped. We went down a corridor and some stairs and ended up at my home from my late teens ;(the home that my daughter was born at).

While we were there my dad was talking to me about laundry and a trip. I went outside and sat on the driveway with my two dogs: one from then, and one from now. Back then I had a small Cocker Spaniel mix, and now I have an American Stoffordshire Terrier, so they were quite opposite sitting out there with me. A lady with a stroller walked by and my small dog walked over to see her. 

My parents came out and said it was time for our trip, so I put the dogs away and we got into a van. I sat in the back of the van. We drove to the snow to go skiing. There were a few of us that didn't have socks, so when we reached to snow we had to stop and buy some. I already had on my ski boots when we got out of the van to go in the store. I feel on my butt directly out of the van in some ice, and again inside the store. The whole time I was walking to the store and even inside for part of the time I was texting my daughter's ex-boyfriend, Nick. The store was open on one side like it had multiple garage doors that were all opened that day. It was a packed store and very "costco"-ish. After I looked at a few things I made my way to some metal steps by the street and sat down. I feel asleep. Water rising up to my feet woke me up. I was a little girl, like maybe 6 or 7. I knew I had left my younger sister on another step, so even though I heard my dad calling me, I went back into a tower of sorts that had another metal stairway going down the center to get my sister. She too was down in some water as I pulled her up and we climbed the stairs together. She was blonde and about 4. (My daughter was blonde when she was 4.   hmmm.)

And that was the end of the dream.

Aside from the inner ear molds, there is nothing about this dream that resembles anything from the past few weeks, so it is most definitely not just a compilation of my thoughts.

I'm not sure I want to find out what it all means. 

For reoccurring themes... there's the laundry... and that's about it. hmmmmm. Again, I have to wonder if I was me the whole time, or if while I was texting Nick, was I my daughter? 

Anyway, I'll think about it. For now, I have to go get my kids to school.

"My Sister"

Last night's dream:

I was in a beauty supply store with my mom. We were picking out hair color. We picked a large (20 oz) jar of cream. The glass jar was amber in color with a metal black lid and no writing.

We went home and were sitting in a room with my sister. At some point prior we had read my sister's diary or schedule book and we knew that she was planning a date that night to go see a movie with Kirk Cameron (her boyfriend). She was asking my mom if she could go, but we knew she had already committed to it.

I questioned her, "Isn't it true that you're going already?" My mom reprimanded me and told me to go in the other room. 

I walked into the living room where my sister's friend and my dad were watching TV. They were watching a movie with Kirk Cameron in it. We were in the movie too and Kirk had just found out that none of us were real or that he wasn't real... I forget exactly. He spilled the Rice Krispies all over the kitchen floor and was picking them up while looking over his shoulder wearily.

I sat on the couch sideways under a blanket in my PJs, (they were really my daughter's PJs).

The I got up to take a shower. I Got out of the shower and stood looking in the mirror with high heels on (they make me look taller and thinner ;-).

As I was standing there a whole conversation about my sister's house ran through my head. Her and her husband had completely paid off their house and were purchasing another one for $25,000, that they would rent out. I thought about that for a while, and went into the hall to talk to her about it.

The End.

This is one of those dreams where I'm not sure I was myself all the time. I could have been my daughter.

One thing is clear... I should really call my sister. That's the third night of dreams about her.

"Alice in Wonderland"

I had a wonderful dream last night... very vivid and with one name that stood out. I said it over and over this morning to remember.

I took the kids to school... came home... and can't remember.

Don't you hate it when that happens?

I do have a backup plan. I went to see Alice In Wonderland last night, and just had some thoughts on that.

People have given some bad reviews, I don't tend to listen to reviews on "artist" films.

Story lines mean nothing to me if the art is good.  Really, I didn't mind the story line. I got just as much from Alice's lesson of making her own choices and living her own life, as I did from the awesome visual trip back to my childhood imagination.

I simply adore seeing visually stimulating imagery.

I had a great time allowing myself to be as "mad" as the hatter or march hare. 

The costumes were inspiring.

When Johny Depp recited the Jabberwocky poem, my heart just swelled in my chest. 

(I loved that poem growing up. My dad even built a whole series of stories around it that he would play out on our backs at 'tuck in' time. Back stories, and those particular ones were called "ruffle-snort stories". He would use the same type of language and tell a story that was really only comprehensible because of the few English words thrown in here and there. He was an English major, and is a very good story teller.)

So... all of this to say... If you enjoy this type of blog... talking about crazy dreams and such, and you haven't seen Tim Burton's version of "Alice in Wonderland"... Go see it.

Cliff Climbing

Well, we have a few minutes before we leave the hotel for the Roman Theater and Dead Sea, so I'll try to squeeze out a dream.

I was at church and Darnisha (worship leader) had me stand up to tell about my trip.  I stood up in the front row and the words I said, as I remembered the sites (which we haven't even seen yet) were, "It was like a fairytale."

After that I walked with Neva (another pastor who deals with hospital visits and calls and hospitality stuff) over to an area of bagged food for the homeless. We looked at it all and I picked up something with my dad and walked behind a crowd.

My dad went to get the car and I followed the crowd all with arms full of stuff. With me, was my sister and Guy (an old friend from HS). We arrived at a hill and started to climb.

Soon the hill was a cliff (still with grass though). We no longer had anything in our hands and the cliff was getting so steep that it was angling towards us. Right near the top I started hanging off the side of the cliff. I was pleading with Guy to help me. "Guy, Guy, please help. I can't pull myself up.  Please help, ....Guy, Guy..."

He pointed out a bar to me that was about 3 feet away from the cliff. I didn't want to go away from the cliff.

Finally he pulled himself into a window, as did my sister, and they started to help me.

The window had a glass that tilted on it's middle so that you could go in the top or the bottom. I came through the top. I was in my night shirt with nothing else on. I was upset that I didn't have on bottoms.

But I got in the window safely.

That was the end.

It was very interesting that I already had images of my trip in my mind when I was telling church about it.

I also found the cliff very intriguing.  Perhaps something will make sense later. 

Not sure if I'll have time to post tomorrow; we'll see.

Food Glorious Food

I have moved on from cheese (Maybe cause I had some cheese on Sunday.) ...now I'm dreaming of burgers, tater-tots, and crab.  For anyone out of the loop, I'm fasting from animal products for 21 days. (not always succeeding when it comes to dairy, my true love. :-))

You may remember me saying that if you dream of the same theme three times in a row take note; It means that the massage/warning/whatever is sure to happen.

So what exactly does it mean when I dream about food three times in a row.  I'm surely going to eat? Ha, well of course I am.  There has to be something beyond that.

#1 There was no background. (Have you ever had a dream with no scenery? Erie isn't it?) The only 'props' were food stands. I was with the junior high youth pastors from my church and we were driving up to a "Tommy's Burger" style food stand with other food stands close by.

#2 With my father in the car, we pull up to a gas station. I say that I would like Burger King. (I don't even like Burger King, but it is also the only fast food that we had on base when I was growing up in the military.)  We go into Burger King and stand in line. Just as I think I'm next, a man squeezes in front of me with his order drawn out on napkins, cartoon style. The only drawing that stands out is one of a little crab, and he asks for "crabbers"; some sort of finger food made of crab.

The next thing I remember is standing by a salad bar type area, and a trashcan, and my tater-tots fall to the ground. I look around at the floor; It's gross. I think about the grossness of tater-tots and I see a gross guy in an old black sports car sitting at the drive-through window.  It's all repulsive.

#3 I'm on some type of mission trip with my husband. We are in a poor looking area, but it seems to be Italy. (We were just in Italy in October, but no place like this.) The restaurant that we are at (seems to be where we are staying as well) is a floating dock anchored to the side of a house. As we are sitting talking, his order comes. It's crab legs. I get upset because I haven't even ordered yet. He hands me the menu, tells me to chill out and pick something.  I pick a yummy stew with potatoes and tomatoes and other veges and spices. (It reminds me of the broth from the Oaxacan sea bass at Claim Jumper.)

Any way, I'd love to say I know exactly what they mean... but I don't.

If I took them all separately I could make some good guesses.  ...like, I'm about to start doing "The Truth Project" with the high school students, and I'm going to met with the youth pastors on Wednesday.  Right now there is no real structure for what I'll be doing, but we're going to look at the options and pick one.  That could interpret the first dream.

The second dream could be me talking myself out of wanting any type of fast food (Something I obviously don't get on the fast), by using one of the restaurants I don't like and making it appear grosser than it already is.

The third could be interpreted that though my husband and I are on a couple's trip, a mission no less, that he is still making the 'orders' before I have a chance to look at the menu. I may need to chill about these things, cause in the end, I still get something good.

All of that could be fine and completely understandable. But why did the last two both involve crab? ...tying them together. Why did the first two involve burger joints? ...linking them. Why did they all three center around food?

Yes, It is possible that I'm just obsessed because of the fast.

hmmm...

Procrastination, and other bad choices

Today is my daughter's 16th Birthday!

Today is also very stormy here, The electricity has already gone off once for 5 minutes.    

 I was hoping to be able to post a picture of the mural I did yesterday, but my husband must have my camera with him.

Last night's dream was very odd.
I was at a house with stairs at the entry, with my mom, sister, and 2 boarders. One was a boy, around the age of 8 who happened to be African American, and the other was a college class mate of mine who is Korean.  (The only significant thing in my past that involves the classmate is that we competed for our first job out of school, and she won.)  
In the dream my family was waiting on my dad to get home from work before we went somewhere.  The little boy kept crossing my path, and I kept asking him if he had had any thing to eat yet.  Gaonou (my class mate) asked me if I wanted to go play tennis. I said yes, and went to get my socks and shoes, etc.  I passed the boy again, and then opened a chest to get socks out of it. I saw an old Judy Garland movie on in the other room where my sister and mom were sitting, so I went in and sat down.  Gaonou called to me again, and I remembered that I was supposed to be getting my shoes on.  As I got to the door my dad came home.  We all got ready to leave and I asked if I should let Knuckles (the dog) stay inside while we were gone.  I opened the door to the back yard and there were three dogs. I went ahead and let Knuckle's in anyway (while in my head saying, "Oh, he has friends to play with."). As soon as he got in, he jumped up onto the full dining table and began to heave. Plus, this wasn't my dog, he was a tall, skinny, Golden Retriever/ Afghan type mix. I ran at him yelling, "Get down!"  It had obviously been a bad idea to let him in.


So that's it... I have no idea what it meant, if anything.


Knuckles has a play mate that just walked in... so "Bye."

 

Entertainment

I imagine this will be normal posting time. I just got home from taking the kids to school. I highly doubt I'll be up early enough to write and get them ready very often.
 I had three dreams again last night (that I remember).
The first was simply me going to spend the night at my high school BF's house. Her dad who is now passed away (lung cancer) was outside sweeping the walk way. I walked on the flower bed to avoid him, but then tracked dirt on the area closest to the door. He gave me a disappointed look, and that was the end of that dream.
Before I tell you my next dream, it's important to know that I went to see the movie "The Book of Eli" yesterday.  It's important because very often the entertainment you put into your head will show up in your dreams. That's one reason I never watch horror movies. If you want your dreams to be truly untainted, you'd have to go without movies, TV, video games, etc. The good news is, even with tainted dreams there are still messages to be discovered.
So, knowing that I went to see "Eli" I'm OK with what happens in this dream.
I'm walking down a street in a bad part of town with my son. I look into a shop that belongs to my friends Gregory and Kookye. (The shop reminds me of the shop in the movie.) (They really did own a consignment store at one point, so that makes sense. Plus Kookye was the last person I got an email from yesterday, so she was on my mind.)  I went on ahead down the street, but my son wanted to stay and play with their daughter (really they have a son). He stayed and I walked on.  Later, I walked back to their shop and it was in much better condition and everything was neatly put away. In a back room my friend Megan (also Kookye's friend) was wrapping presents with other ladies. Her husband Curt came up to me and started showing me his "LUSH" products. I explained to him that I had some LUSH stuff at home. I use their Godiva shampoo. So he offered me a few bath bombs for free. Then one of the ladies wrapping took me to another back room with a Christmas tree in it and toys under the tree. She offered me a plush Tigger for my son. I thought it would be bad to break up the set (they had Pooh and Eeyore and all the rest), but she insisted and I took him.
Then I asked where the restroom was (a very common theme for me obviously). The potty was in a long hallway; girls on one end, boys on the other, but completely open. As I sat there a small Asian man came up to me from down the hall. I got very mad at him for invading my privacy, so I got up and started a knife fight. Many more men and boys joined the fight and by now I was on their end of the hall. The boys were all chubby. I asked, "Do you wanna know what fat looks like?" then I cut (with my small pocket knife) each one of them in their bare bellies (little 3-5" cuts, but deep enough to see the layer of fat).
Like I said, I'm OK with this, cause I know the slashing of bodies came from the movie yesterday. But I find it interesting that they were chubby and that my one memorable line had to do with fat.
Both my son and I are about 30 pounds overweight and can't seem to motivate ourselves to loose the weight.

My third dream was a camping trip with old high school friends and my parents. (My dad pastored the youth during my childhood, so that's not a strange scenario.) People I remember in the dream were Amy, Jodie, Christie, and my BF Vanessa. Near the beginning of the dream the girls were are crowded around a dimly lit mirror getting ready. We were leaving that day. The camp was beach side, and some how we went, with our suitcases and sleeping bags, out onto floating  (10' in diameter) burlap sand bags. My mom tipped them over looking for a flatter side for us to walk on, but they all sank. So we were swimming with suitcases and sleeping bags trying to pull up the floaties. Finally we swam to next section of floating structures which is a giant round white with a red bulls-eye inflatable. There are people sitting on edge and walking on top, we bounce onto the inflatable. I start to wonder if people will fall, so we stop bouncing and walk across. We get in the car (my Durango) and head off.  On the road the water comes right up to the asphalt.  My mom is driving and she keeps veering into the water. I point it out to her, as well as pointing out the harbor in the distance, and a paradise looking place where two girls are swimming with swans and weeping willows are planted in the water. I want to go there, but we have to get everyone home. We start to discuss who to take home first according to the order of their houses. Vanessa lives closest to me, Amy lives furthest, etc.

I'm not going to take any time time today looking deeper cause I have to go paint at my friend Kim's house. Maybe you can try and decode something for me. :-)

My ex who lived in Tex(as)

I'm almost embarrassed that this happened already. Two things really. Number one that I dreamed of my ex, and two, that I was over confident that I would remember it all.  I woke up in the middle on the night with the dream very fresh, and talked myself out of writing it down, cause I was sure I'd remember it.  But, as luck would have it, I woke up with only a few details of that dream and nothing from any that might have followed.

All I can remember is that we were swimming in a lake. (I think we even had life vests). At the beginning of the dream we were in a house with stairs and his wife was there.  We all talked. Then I took him away. The swimming was part of something with my extended family, namely my Dad and his parents. Later in the dream I was in a room at my grandparent's house with my husband. My best two high school girlfriends came to get me. I began to pack a suitcase. But somehow ended up hiding in another room in a pile of clothes/blankets on the side of a bed, from my dad, (who found me).


In deciphering any of this, it may be helpful to know that my dad is a preacher, and so is his Dad (Pawpaw). I attribute our legacy of faith more to my grandmother though.  But either way you look at it, I have come to always assume a spiritual meaning when I'm at my grandparent's house in dreams. In every dream of their house it is a mansion; sometimes with a business going on inside, and other times with many bedrooms for guests. I'd like to conclude that the guests of their house have become a part of their legacy. But that's just a desire of mine, I'm not sure if it's right.  
Anyway, the part about my two high school friends, I imagine, is just me looking forward to our 'girl's weekend' coming up in March. They both live in other states, so it is very rare that I see them, outside of Facebook. :-)
Hiding in the blankets on the side of the bed instantly reminds me of how I wake up many mornings. You see, my dog Knuckles sleeps in blankets right beside my bed and often whines for me to join him.  Which, being the pushover that I am, I often do.  So we can assume that I was hiding in a "dog's" bed from my father (who often represents my view of my heavenly father... and we all know you can't hide from Him).
I'd like to say that interactions with my ex during the dream were purely innocent, but often in my dreams there is still a spark between us.  It is encouraging though, to know that often what may seem to have sexual undertones (or overtones) in dreams really has nothing to do with sex.  It's often just symbolic of intimacy in talking, or in a common interest. In many of my dreams that involve him, our daughter is present, but in this one she wasn't. However, I'd like to point out that his wife was there, and had no problem with me taking him.  That in itself says that this was probably an innocent interaction. 


I know we didn't make a complete interpretation, but completion is not always necessary. (Plus I don't have all the other bits and pieces.) I think, for me today, it's enough to know that even in my subconscious I honor his wife, and that if I hide, God sees me anyway. 
I also wanted to point out that I don't believe this dream was divine in nature. There are self dreams and God dreams, and some that mix both. Even though this dream had God elements, I don't think it was from Him. I think it was just my own brain working out some issues. 
When I have "God dreams" they are typically very vivid in color and clear. Those are the ones to pay attention to! That's not to say that self dreams can't be helpful. They often reveal a lot about the issues you are struggling with, or excited over, or even the ones you are avoiding.


My last comment is to my 'comments'
Thank you all for leaving them. 
1. As for remembering dreams, pray or self talk to yourself that you will remember, that often works.
2. Yes, personal symbolism is the key... which leads me to...
3. Dream dictionaries can be helpful, but hardly dependable, because symbolism is so very personal. (personal culture, religion, family dynamics, fears, etc. all taint words for us, so that they don't mean the same to each person.)  Unless an interpreter is listening to God (or to a demon in many cases) their interpretation will be based on their own symbolism, or will be very general. Demonic interpretation may have elements of truth, but it will not be with your benefit in mind. Most profitable new-age dream interpreters have tapped in to evil spirits.  With that said, no, I don't think I will be using the suggested web site. (Maybe I will, to prove my generalization point at some time.)  The best way to interpret dreams is to know yourself and what things mean to you. (Of course, I'd add prayer too.)