Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Nursery News

Last night's dream woke me up with a start this morning.
I can't remember the first half of it, though I know it was a long one from the fuzzy imagery that remained.
The last part however, I remember vividly.
I was helping at a nursery that was in a two story house. There were three other workers aside from myself, all female. We had a hand full of infants and a few toddlers. The workers were speaking in broken sentences mixed with baby sign-language. At first I didn't understand why they were not speaking the whole sentence, but then I watched the head chick and saw that she was acting out things and really only using the words that were important to the idea she was trying to convey. The head lady started going up stairs and I picked up a little Chinese girl. She was around 6 mos old and as I picked her up I felt that there was fat on the back of her head. It was an odd thing to notice, but that and her round face, and body swaddled in a white blanket were the things that stood out to me.
I put her down on a mat on the floor laying face up and then I turned to see breaking news on the TV to my right. The news was of a plane crash. My entire vision went completely to the screen. The picture was of a large cartoon statue of a guy in a baseball cap. The announcer said, "This is all the footage we have from the tragedy that just occurred in Florida." He mentioned Joe Maloof as the owner of the team who's stadium had been crashed into,(and who's image the cartoon figure was). I also saw my son's principle in the footage.
When the camera showing the cartoon figure stopped they cut to another camera that showed a large marching band dressed in sky blue and white leaping from the top of the stadium to their death. They were all looking up and behind them and screaming as they jumped. Another camera showed another area that looked more like an enormous mall with ladies with bags and other random people jumping off of glass partial walls and past escalators and fountains and other "mall fixtures". Everybody was running like chickens with their heads cut off and jumping off of walls. The plane they mentioned was a Pan Am flight (which of course went under in the early 90's).

What do you make of that?
Well... I can see some of my yesterday popping through...
I was talking with Kelly yesterday about adoption and the sad state of unwanted Chinese baby girls. That explains the baby, though not the fat on the back of her head.
I was also reading a book last night (while my son was at drum lessons) about WWII. The book is Noah Hutching's autobiography, and I just happen to be in the part of the book about his experience at the war and fighting the Japanese.
This could be why I was dreaming of a plane coming down... though I hadn't got to any planes crashing til my reading this morning. Plus, those were fighter planes, not passenger planes, and not Pan-Am, and not in Florida, and nothing to do with sports or any Maloof family member.
That's one reason I wanted to write about it this morning... I have no idea why I dreamed it. Nothing in my world relates.
So... that's it. I guess I'll think on it some more, but otherwise, I'll just wait and see if something pops up.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Laundry and Teeth

Last night's dream stared me and my mom.
I was doing laundry... putting clothes in a very deep washing machine. Then I went to my mom's room and was looking for clothes to pack to go to summer camp. She opened a lower drawer for me and I started digging through it. I pulled out one shirt that I thought was something I wanted, then as I unfolded it, it became my son's Perry the Platypus T-shirt. Again I reached in the drawer and pulled out an article of clothing that ended up being my son's underwear. I pulled out one more thing of my son's and complained to my mom that these things aren't mine, they are his.

That was the extent of the dream.
As for interpretation... With me clothing dreams have to do with my weight and what track I'm on concerning my body. This specific dream equates me with my son. I started a diet this week... the same diet that I did this summer while my son was at a weight loss summer camp. I am mentally preparing myself for the journey ahead. It was so much easier when no kids were home this summer, but I won't have that this summer, so I'm going ahead and doing it now. The deep washing machine tells me that there is a lot of "cleansing" to do, and the lower drawer tells me that I'm at the bottom of this thing.

Saturday night I had another interesting dream. The night itself was interesting because I was dog sitting three dogs that were not mine. Two of them are chiweenie puppies, the same age as my Lhasa apso puppy. Very "needy" pups. Because I am such a push over I slept with all three of the other dogs and my own puppy. First on the couch, then up in the guest room. Every time I would move they would all wake up and re-arrange themselves. It was a long night to say the least!
Anyway I think the dream spoke of my situation as well as me being a push-over in general, and my indecision... or more pointedly, my inability to stick to decisions... to stand up to others, or even dogs for that matter.

The dream started with my sister and I walking to a camp site. (My sister, though I have no right to blame her any further, is the root of where I got my "door mat" status. She's a year older than me and was my boss and my mouth piece all through childhood.) We got to the area that we thought should be camp and there was a parking garage. We went up some cement stairs that were enclosed just like in a normal parking garage. As we looked we started to hear voices. It was my dad along with the rest of the youth group for camp. (My dad was a youth pastor for much of my childhood.) We scurried back down the stairs to meet them. There was a discussion that I didn't hear and my sister came to me and said, "they don't have room for everyone in the nice cabins. You and I should take one of the bad ones."
Well, I didn't want to take a bad one, but I didn't say anything. Then June (a lady from my church who is famous for her hugs) came up to me and hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You don't deserve a bad room, you should have a nice one."
I looked at my dad who was talking to the group and noticed that his teeth were brown and that they were fanned out on the top row like the old cartoon drawings of hillbillies. I saw that he had a cup of coffee in his hand. "You should rinse your mouth ofter you drink coffee Dad," I said. (Our dentist just told my daughter the same thing about soda last week... that's where that's from.) Then out of nowhere my grandmother (Dad's mom) appears and walks up to my dad and pulls out one of his teeth. The tooth she pulled came from the canine area, but it looked like a molar. My dad protested and then he pulled out his entire top row of teeth all at once on a metal grid. The teeth were large and each wrapped with metal that strung them all together. He was pointing out the spot that the one she had pulled came from, and arguing with her. Then I woke up.

As I said, I think that night, feeling very "trampled on", both figuratively, and literally, this dream speaks to being pushed around and being indecisive. My dad is the same way. Also, loosing teeth in dreams usually has to do with not being about to deal with things. (lost Incisors = indecision, lost molars = inability to "chew on things") That's John Paul Jackson's theory, not mine... But it seems to hold true in my dreams. Perhaps the image of my dad with terrible teeth is a symbolic warning of sorts to what lies ahead of me if I don't get this thing under control.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Advice and Tres Leche Cake

The night before last I had an "advice" dream, featuring my pastor's wife and a few other church ladies.
In the dream I was watching one of the worship leaders at my old church, and talking to my pastor's wife about my involvement. She was telling me that I needed to step it up. I also had to get my friend Terese's shoes in the dream. And in the dream Terese was wearing all brown. In one book I read the author said brown signifies pastoral stuff, but who knows. All I know is that it's pretty clear that I need to get my act together this coming year and not be so apathetic about my "assignments".

Last night I had two dreams; one about an ex of mine (Shane) making Tres Leche cake and I was instructing him. I was also noticing his muscular build and his air force hair-do. (This is new in dreams, cause typically I dream of him the way I remember him from high school or college days, not the way he is now.)
I think the part about the cake has to do with me being on a diet after so many sweets over Christmas, so now automatically my brain goes to what I can't have.
At the end of the dream my husband and kids were calling me to get in the car and leave. I told Shane he looked good and gave him a hug. Then I commented that he smelled good too, (I had a brief naughty thought, and must have been shocked at myself, cause I woke myself up.) :-)

The dream before that is fuzzy, but I remember one part in particular where I had to use the rest room and couldn't find it,(a common occurrence in my dreams). I finally found a green house looking building that was the rest room and I went in.
I could see through the glass walls, but they were dark and foggy with vines and such growing up around the outside so I didn't worry about people seeing in. I sat down, only to look behind me and see at least ten other people. I decided to just look forward (through the glass) and not think about what the others may be doing.
It was an odd dream, but then again, so are all of my "potty dreams".

Thursday, December 16, 2010

The past three nights

I have been able to sleep in the past three days which really makes a difference for how well I remember my dreams! With no alarm clock you are able to naturally wake up, and then sift through your thoughts without the pressure of time.

I'll start with last night:
I had a freeway dream... Pointing out that almost ALL of my freeway dreams are futuristic. Freeways with layers and various directions all intertwined. Well last night's I was NOT the driver, unless you count back seat driving. I was riding in a car with family (though I can't remember who was driving or which part of my family was with me. I think my mom was there.). Anyway, we were going somewhere but were unsure of which exit to take. The roads were so confusing cause there weren't signs that said things like "Sacramento next exit", you just had to look at which way the roads went and know which way you wanted to go. The ramps were like pretzels though, so you could tell which one led North or South or whatever. We wanted to go to the right but we missed the turn and didn't realize it until it was too late and we were headed for a long bridge. (It reminded me of driving into Long Beach from San Pedro.) We couldn't turn around and there were no exits until after the bridge which seemed to just get longer and longer as we drove. It started to look like a post apocalyptic scene from "The Book of Eli".
I woke up out of frustration that I couldn't turn around.

The night before I had a dream about my friend Barbara and her two daughters. My family lived across the hall from her in an apartment building with thin walls. We could hear everything that they said. I found out that they were baking a chocolate cake and I went over to taste it. As I ran out into the entry/stairwell area I noticed that there were no rails around the stairs and that I could fall to my death. We were at least 5 stories up and it looked very scary spiraling down. Her daughter Brooklyn ran up the stairs yelling. I stopped running and eased my way to her door. I went in, got some chocolate cake and went back to my apartment to taste the strawberry cake that my husband had made. (Yeah right :-) .) I tasted them both side by side and then went back into the entryway and looked at the stairwell again. It now had rails up and I wondered if it had ever been unsafe, or if I had imagined it.

The night before that I had a dream about my grandparent's house. (Not the one they live in now... but the one they lived in during my childhood.) I always wanted to live in their house when I grew up. I thought it was a mansion when I was little. We lived in a trailer, and then in other small houses most of my childhood, so their three story house was huge to me.
Anyway, in the dream I was selling the house to a family with a little girl. It was like an open house viewing and then I invited them to stay (like on "Funny Farm"). I was cooking in a large kitchen (bigger than their actual kitchen) making them some dinner. The dad went to check on his daughter. I heard all of their names spoken. The dad was Eugene, the daughter was Emma-gene, and the mom had a "gene" name too. The daughter was only 3 or so and had gone upstairs. I went up too, and noticed that the stairs were not safe. They had gaps large enough for Emma-gene to fall through. (The stairs were very grand like on "Gone With the Wind"). I looked through a few rooms upstairs appreciating how royal looking and warm they were. I had in my mind that I would not sell the house. I came back down stairs sliding down the banister with Emma-gene in my arms and gave her to her parents.


I didn't mean to wait three days before posting... but often when you do wait (or if you'll go back to look at the weeks dreams before you analyze them) you'll find a common thread.
I could talk about these three as individuals, but for now I'm going to lump them together and see the common thread.
They are all about safety... and choosing one of two options.
All three deal with uncertainty, and not feeling safe.
Last night's dream, I knew where I wanted to go, but I let someone else choose the wrong way(they were driving),and I complained from the back seat. And the further we went down the "wrong" path, the more desolate and hopeless it became.
The middle dream (inspired no-doubt because Barb and her girls have been coming over making Christmas goodies with me three times in the past week,) dealt with the danger of the stairs and the choice of which cake was better.
Before that... I dealt again with dangerous stairs and the choice of whether or not to sell my grandparent's house.
Because the names were mentioned and because they all had the root of "gene" I thought I'd look that up. The name Eugene and just Gene mean "well-born, noble" Emma means "whole, complete, universal".
It's interesting because my grandparent's house means a lot to me. When I dream of them it is always in a mansion (way bigger than their real home) and it always has to do with their legacy of faith to me. I attribute my Christian heritage to them and their raising my dad to be who he is. (Both my grandpa and my dad are preachers.) I can't even imagine thinking of selling my faith... and what does it mean that I thought of selling it to people who were noble? Was I selling it for nobility? Well either way I'm glad I decided not to in the end... but why bring up that the stairs were dangerous for the little girl? hmmmm. Just an excuse?
Does that run into the other dream of making excuses for why not to go out to the entry way... "it's too dangerous". I have often debated if the friendship I have there is "good for me" or not. Knowing a lot about people (hence the thin walls that we could hear through) especially when you think what they are doing is dangerous... can be uneasy.
Then we have other people driving my life. It happens quite often with me.
I REALLY need to learn this lesson.

To me/from me:
"Drive your own life... You don't need excuses to make decisions that are about you to begin with. Safe is just a frame of mind... You're only scared because you're scared of what others will think/say/or be hurt by. Man up!"

Thursday, December 9, 2010

FIRE!

Last night's dream started with me babysitting some kids (aged 5-12ish) and walking them to the park near their house.
We left from their house, which reminded me of base housing on one of the AF bases where I grew up, (Edwards AFB). We took a few turns and were suddenly in a very industrial looking part of town at a park that sat between a subway station and warehouses. Even in the dream I found this weird, so I asked the oldest girl how the scenery had changed so quickly. As we were talking a group of policemen with a pack of K-9 shepherds walked to the park. The main handler of the pack walked right past us, and I went up to him to ask what was up. He mentioned a fire a few blocks away that was spreading quickly and he pointed in the direction of the house that we had come from.
For some reason I thought it was important to go back and get things out of the house so I ran back with my son who was with us.
We got to the house (which was now more like a trailer in a trailer park) and the fire had not reached it yet.
Inside the house it was obvious that the family that lived there only had one small baby girl, and that they liked to collect very cool wooden dolls that looked like they came from Germany or Austria or Switzerland. I started gathering what I thought looked the most expensive and told my son to gather things too. Then I called my mom's cell phone to ask what she thought I should do, since the people were her friends. (Either she, or the people, or both were vacationing in Hawaii.)She mentioned the diapers and practical things. "Oh... ok".
As I walked out with my arms full I saw smoke rising from below the house all around the foundation. I yelled for my son to come on out... that we wouldn't get any more we just needed to go. We ran out and onto a gravel drive with pine trees all around... Then I woke up.

The only part that came directly from life is the Hawaii part. I spoke to my mom yesterday about us all going to Hawaii together in May.
The dolls could be reminiscent of Christmas decorations I like that I have seen since this season started. The kids reminded me a little of the kids in the Narnia stories, which I'm looking forward to seeing this week, and I have seen a few German shepherds lately...
But really... nothin.
I do find it interesting that the last dream I remembered well was about a Tidal wave, and the one before that about an earthquake... Now here we have a fire. Next I should have a tornado... oh wait, I had one of those already too, kinda, with the hurricane winds that knocked off chunks of the skyscrapers in NY. (I think I wrote about that one on here.)
Anyway... I'm just happy I remembered a dream this week... it's been a while.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Tidal Wave

Real quick... (Cause I gotta go to church)

Last night I had a dream inside a dream.
I had a dream that there was a tidal wave and that my family was safe. Then I woke up (inside the dream) and was getting up with my husband. We lived in an old Victorian three story house up on a hill. We got dressed and I noted that everyone else was asleep. That included my kids and my aunt and one other child... maybe my niece or nephew. We were all on the top floor. I walked down stairs with my husband and out to the front porch. I looked down the hill to the main street of the town. (The hill we were on was at least a half a mile above the rest of the town). We were both standing there like with our morning coffee or something and a white rolling cloud could be seen in the distance. As I focused on it I could tell it was a tidal wave crashing through the city. I looked at my husband and said, "I dreamed this! Don't worry, we'll be OK. We need to go upstairs." We thought about waking everyone up, but I had a peace about being OK, so we didn't.
Then I woke up for real... pretty freaked.

Weird huh?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

New York Storm

Halloween night I had a dream about a huge storm in New York.
Hurricane winds ripped through the city. Windows of sky-scrapers burst, and shattered glass rained down on people. Tornado funnels took chucks out of buildings.
It was a very realistic and disturbing dream.
I wasn't there. I was watching it like a movie with various camera angles etc.
Again, nothing I've watched or seen recently explains why I dreamed of a storm, or New York...